dirty rotten scoundrels

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Whoever first put the words it’s, not, my and fault together for the very first time should have been a billionaire. If he’d patented the phrase he’d have made a fortune! We all use it day in day out because offloading the blame onto someone else for everything that ever goes wrong is second nature to us… and that includes car accidents.

If you have a fender bender, you never think through what happened logically. The rose tinted glasses come on and it’s always the other person’s fault, even when it’s not. This definitely makes for some of the most absurd excuses ever when people try to claim on their car insurance. After all, if it is your fault you end up paying more for your cover the next year.

So without further ado, welcome to the weird and wonderful world of car insurance claims! Here are ten of the best:

1 – The Mother In Law

Most of us know how annoying the mother in law can be when it comes to interfering in your business but one 66 year old from Mississippi took it took far when she was nagging her daughter’s husband from the back seat of his $39,099 Porsche. Her nagging riled him so much that he put his foot on the accelerator instead of the break and ploughed into the identical $39,099 Porsche in front of him at a red light! His compare car insurance company was sympathetic but turned down his claim on account of his carelessness so he had to fork out the $78,198 for two new cars!

2 – The Dog

Neighbours watched on, horrified, as a teenage girl in Maine drove her car headlong into her home’s closed garage door before reversing sharply into the oncoming traffic. The eleven car pile up blocked the entire main road for close to ten hours and caused major traffic problems through both rush hours and close to $310,000 of damage. When the rescue team eventually got to the girl, she blamed her dog! Not only had the dog knocked the car into reverse and then into drive, he’d also fallen onto the accelerator. He claim was laughed out of court, and her car insurance company didn’t pay up either!

3 – The Wall

After taking the same route to work every morning for 15 years, you’d think an Idaho man would know exactly where he was going by now. Not so, apparently. He turned right a mile from his office as normal and slammed straight into a brick wall, causing $60,400 worth of damage to the wall and his brand new car. He spent two weeks in a coma after the accident, only to wake up and declare the brick wall had moved overnight. It hadn’t, he’d just taken the turn 100 yards too early!

4 – The Technology

Satellite Navigation systems have revolutionized driving. No more maps, no more hassle, just straight to where you want to go, unless you happen to be one particular man from London, England. He drove his £25,595 BMW Z1 straight into the River Thames because his Sat Nav told him to. Granted the river had covered the road after flooding at the time, but surely common sense would’ve told him to take another route? Apparently not!

5 – The Cell Phone

Answering your phone when driving is now illegal in the UK so one Liverpudlian decided to try and get out of paying the fine and having three points put on his license by dreaming up an outrageous excuse for it when he was pulled over by the cops. He claimed he wasn’t answering his phone but trying to switch it off because the signal was interfering with his transmission and could’ve caused an accident. It got him out of a ticket but not out of jail when he ploughed into a £30,450 4×4 a little down the road after answering his phone!

6 – The Wife

Men blames their wives for everything under the sun, but one Tennessee man took it a little bit further. He had crashed headlong into three cars parked on the sidewalk in an affluent area of town after an alcohol-fuelled night out. After causing $75,600 damage to the cars, he drove off into the night. When the cops caught up with him the next morning, he claimed his wife had the car the previous night so they began looking for her. They eventually found her in the local hospital… which is where she’d been for the past two weeks! Needless to say the man was promptly arrested!

7 – The Cops

An 18 year old got into a high-speed chase with two police cars in Georgia and managed to outrun them for thirty miles before crashing into another car on the freeway and losing control. He totalled his dad’s Mercedes and the other unlucky driver’s Subaru, causing $69,673 of damage. When he was released on bail, he tried to claim the cost back on his car insurance, stating the police engaged him in a chase so it was entirely their fault. The car insurance company disagreed.

8 – God

Of all the absurd fender bender excuses, blaming God has to be the wackiest going but that was just what a Christian lady from California did! She claimed that she was driving and suddenly received a message from God telling her to turn left immediately. She didn’t say why he wanted her to turn left, but she did cause a six-car pile up because she cut across a car as she turned and demolished the front of the house that she drove directly into. All in all, the woman had to cough up $354,825 for the material damage she’d caused and a further $250,000 for the metal anguish of the family that had watched her ruin their beautiful home! Her car insurance company refused to pay out and God didn’t save her from jail.